Confessions of a Laid-off Lawyer

Just Your Average Joe Blogging Away His Debt—In One Year or Less

Change is Gonna Come

with 5 comments

Total Black: $1,088.80
Total Red: $230,621.20

As I noted in The Rat Race, a change has already come and more is on the way.  I stopped being frivolous with my money.  The thousand dollars reflected above in total black, part payment from the colleague I worked for since starting this project back in August, it’s already been allocated to a credit card and is just waiting to be debited.  That payment cuts that card in half.  On track to paying off at least one credit card by the end of January, as I vowed in Resolutions For the New Year.  I had said I’d pay rent with that check, but the landlord can wait a bit longer.  I didn’t work all those hours for the colleague to send that money to the landlord.  Hair-splitting, I know, but it’s the principle of it.  I also worked eleven hours today and I’m on track to do so again tomorrow.  And I’ve picked up quite a few shifts all this week and next at the theatre gig.  Cashing In My Karma once again.

After work tonight I hit the gym.  After showering (and surreptitiously snapping a few pics of myself in a towel (got some nude modeling gigs in the works)), I returned to my locker to get changed and then head home.  And what did I uncover but a barrage of emails had fluttered in.  Well . . . barrage is a bit of a stretch, but comments and criticisms from a few readers; fan mail, as it were.

The image that leaped to mind is of the hard-working kid, focused, driven, brow sweaty, eyes on the prize . . . while the school-year bullies scoff and make fun of him, trying to beat him down and deter him from his dream.  I welcome readers trying to knock me back down on my knees.  Some keep me grounded.  Others humble.  And the rest reinvigorate me to keep going.  As I typed this entry, almost as if on cue, another comment and criticism came in back to back.  Life is amazing like that some times.

Last night as I was walking home Seal came on.  “A Change is Gonna Come” from his album Soul.  I switched to it tonight again on my walk home. Just a great song over all.  Really sassy and soulful.  Defiant for sure.  As I walked home listening to it, it got me thinking about my efforts and my readers.  There’s a great verse maybe half-way into the song: “So now I go to my brother / And I say, ‘Brother!  Help me please!’ / But somehow he winds up / knocking me / back down on my knees.”

See this evening, as I walked back home, for a quick second the temptation took hold to stop for a slice of pizza.  Devil on one shoulder told me that I can swing it since I had about eight dollars available in the checking account linked to my debit card.  But then Angel on the other shoulder reminded me about my Back to Cash pledge and the comments I had just received.  Instead, when I got home tonight, I sent that eight dollars to a credit card.  Who says you have to make the minimum payment all at once?

A change is gonna come.  I know.

Written by Laid-off Lawyer

January 12, 2010 at 23:37

5 Responses

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  1. Dude, your landlord started eviction proceedings against you once already, and then you countersued him. Something tells me his patience for you is in negative territory and that he’d evict you in a heartbeat. Do you really want that on your record? Your financial decisions are stunningly poor. Housing (as cheap as you can possibly make it) and food (as many cheap homemade meals as possible) first, along with any serious meds you need. Then debt. Then frivolous expenses (like an expensive gym, coffee and meals out, clothes, books, cable, going out to bars, etc.).


    January 13, 2010 at 08:50

  2. If you can’t pay your rent, you should end your lease (I’m sure your landlord would be happy to see you go) and move in with your mom ASAP.


    January 13, 2010 at 08:53

  3. My prediction, with interest is that you will owe atleast $240,000 at the end of 2010. I know you went to law school, but you do know what interest is, right? If these “ideas” you have go unchecked you may be subjected to an involuntary 72 hour hold at a mental institution.

    Mike Jefferson

    January 13, 2010 at 20:34

  4. Agreed. You can’t choose to live in a pricey New York City apartment but then decide not to pay for it. Live with the consequences of your choice — having to pay exorbitant rent — or get out.


    January 13, 2010 at 20:36

  5. I suspect that they started those eviction proceedings because it was the last two months of my lease and I hadn’t renewed. I could be wrong, however, but when you’re living somewhat hand-to-mouth, it’s all hands on deck with debt. The banks don’t want to wait any more than the landlord does, but this time he’ll have to. I dumped all the money I made from the last temp project on rent and rushing to get it paid in time. Turns out that was a mistake because by paying my arrears I mooted my own defenses in my counter-claims. Since there was no reason left to be in court, as in I had already paid my rent, the judge kicked out the case.

    Laid-off Lawyer

    January 15, 2010 at 06:08

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